Best Life Tips in Honor of My Late Mother
Although this isn’t the first Mother’s Day without my mom, I see this year as the first Mother’s Day without her. On March 24, 2017, my precious, stubborn, tough-loving mother Sharron J. White passed away. Last year’s Mother’s Day? I was still in shock. I was still taking care of her business affairs for months.
This year, I am a little more settled and still missing my mother. My mother was a strong, highly-opinionated and vocal woman. Yes, ladies, I got all my mouth from her and my aunts. If you know my story though, I had to work through a lot of issues to be who you know me to be today. When I started on this journey I didn’t know how to be a wife. I watched women boss men around and they didn’t take any prisoners. But I thank God for what I did learn from my mother. In her honor, I am going to share with you my best tips from her. Then I will share some of my tips for being a Godly wife and a mother..
First I learned from my mom. Please and Thank You are universal words that can take you very far in life. My mother was strong but she was a lady. She taught us manners and etiquette that allowed me to attract an incredible man like my husband. Ladies, don’t turn your nose up at old school common courtesies. They will take you a long way.
Second, never think that you are so smart that you don’t ask questions! It is ironic that I am a coach to hundreds of wives. I remember thinking I knew everything and nobody could tell me nothing. Sound familiar? But my mother taught me to never get so full of myself that I don’t ask questions. Wives, don’t assume things about your husband. Ask! I don’t care if you have 50 years of marriage under your belt. Ask questions often! This will strengthen your relationship and help to quiet your mind.
Third, for every decision that you make in life, there will be a good or bad consequence. So make your decision knowing you are going to have to live with those consequences! For example, you decided to go back to school. That decision is bringing tension into your marriage. Be prepared. And don’t accept the bad consequences without first trying to make them better. Have your husband meet you after class and you all can grab a bite to eat. Or change your study times so you can have some special time with him. My mom taught me to make lemon meringue pie when life served me lemons.
Fourth, pray and leave it in God’s hands. He is the only one with the RIGHT answer anyway! Being a boss made me a bit controlling. I learned how to handle my business from my mom for sure. But we aren’t meant to think so much of ourselves that we forget to see God move on our behalf. Mom taught me to be a praying woman. Through prayer, I learned how to trust God with my everything – finances, marriage, children. Everything.
Lastly, my mom taught me to do right by people, even when I am losing, because good and right will always prevail in the end. Now, that’s some wisdom right? My husband and I have been through so many ups and downs, but I remembered to do right. Even when I wanted revenge or was too frustrated to know what was right, I went to God in prayer and He led me to do good.
Now my mom was a great mom, but she wasn’t a wife. Here are some tips that I have for you moms who are also wives. This goes for stepmoms as well.
Wives, don’t put your kids before your spouse, no matter what. A good friend compared kids to animals – they can smell fear or in our case, they can smell discord or division. Always show them a united front, even if you have to agree with your kids in private. Your spouse came before the kids and we want him to be there after they are grown and gone.
Work as a team to guide your children. You know the saying “Mother Knows Best.” Don’t let that go to your head and then you isolate your husband. He is the head of your home and he has opinions and views about raising children too. Talk to him about it and if you disagree on something, see the tip above.
Even though wife and mom are important roles, remember you are a woman, God’s daughter, first. I have seen wonderful women diminish their interests and delay their dreams. Some and even be afraid of trusting their spouse with an idea or a passion they want to pursue. In honor of Mother’s Day, I want you to remember YOU! You can still love him without losing you. I am even teaching a class on this topic this Summer, click here for more details.
Thank you for allowing me to share my heart about my mom and how much I learned from her. I miss picking up the phone and calling her. But as you can see, she left a long lasting legacy on my life for generations to come. I also want to thank the play mothers, the aunties, Godmothers, foster or adoptive mothers. You may not have given birth but we wouldn’t be a village without you. I couldn’t be everywhere at all times. But there was always a Godly woman nearby watching over my children. And I gave them permission to get my boys in line when they were acting up.
Happy Mother’s Day One Sexy Wife!